I Love to Never Forget

Aloha and welcome to apartment 206!

Today I want to share and recognize the amazing bond that Jason and I share: The history and love of Michelle and Jason.

Even though Jason and I lived around the corner from each other when we were young and ran with the same social group throughout junior high, we were merely acquaintances (that had onced danced as nervous twelve year olds!) And acquaintances we remained while Jason attended Palo Alto High School and I attended Hyde High School all the way across the country in Woodstock Connecticut. And then, years later we met, and fell deeply in love.

I have been sick with a cold for the past five days and Jason has just been an angel. I often take for granted the little things Jason does that make my life happy and complete. So I think it is appropriate to dedicate this blog to Jason and the love we share.

It was a little over a month after receiving my second DUI and I was slowly picking up the pieces of my messy life. I was drinking less and was focusing all energy on working double shifts and long hours. The last thing on my mind men – I was dealing with so much I figured no guy would want to date a girl with the baggage I brought with me. And then on a cold Friday night after a long night of waitressing our lives collided.

Fridays were my favorite night of the week. This was not because it meant a weekend of relaxation; as a waitress the weekends were mandatory. Fridays were my favorite because after work I would go over to my friends house where we would play poker until Saturday's sun began to peak out. So on this particular Friday, after getting off of work a little later than usual, I hurried to the bar across the street to change out of my work clothes and get a quick drink before heading over to Dave's. As I walked into the bar I was greeted by a handsome man who bellowed, "Michelle Hodges!" A little embarrassed by my memory lapse I smiled and he introduced himself: Jason Moore. I was in a hurry to get to poker, so we didn't talk much; however, the words were spoke I will always remember. Like me, he was recovering from a second DUI and immediately I felt closer and less embarrassed by the curtain state of chaos I felt had gulped up my normal life. We talked quickly, as I was still trying to get to poker before midnight, but I left the bar with Jason's number and a warm fuzzy feeling (which was not a reaction of the Irish Car Bomb a pounded while we were talking.

A couple days later I called Jason and before long we were spending almost all our free time together. I was immediately drawn to Jason's sensitivity and felt immediately comfortable sharing with him items of my past that often sent other guys packing. Most specifically, on our second date I told him about the electroshock treatment I endured due to depression and the long-term memory damage I will live the rest of my life with. I noticed how well he listened and how well he understood chronic depression. While it took him a little longer to dump his baggage on me, we immediately connected and it felt like no matter how much time we spent together it was just not enough.

I now feel certain that Jason is the man I was meant to spend the rest of my life. I have never loved a man as I do Jason and I feel completely comfortable with him; I don't have to hide things from Jason because I know he loves me regardless of my flaws. While the entire past two years have not all been a picnic, he has been there for me when things were bad, as I was also there for him. Jason cares for me when my pain gets bad, running errands and taking hours of his time on the light rail just to pick up my medications from Kaiser. He has a giving heart and is always there for me when things get rough.

After being together over two years, I am more in love with Jason than ever. When he hurts I feel his pain, and when he laughs it brings me joy. Because we each suffer from emotional disorders and painful circumstances we are, together, able to stand strong.

 

When I hold Jason's hand I close my eyes and believe anything is possible.

I drew this with pens and colored pencils. It says "Jason Forever Michelle." See if you can find it!